Meeting of the Emilys

I have failed to mention in any amount of length, that I had the chance to meet up with Emily of Skinny Emmie Monday. She just happened to be in Nashville helping a friend out and was kind enough to make time to have lunch!

Emily is doing her first half-marathon Sunday!

As if committing to walk 13.1 miles isn't awesome enough, she is also raising money for Parkinson's Disease research for the Kentucky Neuroscience Institute in honor of her mom, who passed away from the disease. If you haven't donated - do it, NOW!

She's only $173 away from her goal, so even $5 truly helps.

What are you waiting for? Go! Now!

Out of control

Life has been beyond out of control this week.

It started with a binge on baked chips Sunday night. I didn't eat the whole bag, but I ate enough to make me feel crummy.

Then Monday I woke up with a migraine, which just made me feel nauseous. So although I have plenty of stuff to get done at work before I go out of town tomorrow, I took half the day off. Last night I laid down at 7 to take a power hour nap before getting a few things done before bed. Yeah, I didn't get out of bed until 7 am. Although I woke up throughout the night with plenty of pain.

I decided to take today off too, which has only given me more stress and anxiety trying to figure out how to finish everything I need to do tomorrow. I leave for St. Louis after work.

I haven't tracked my food in 2 days.

I haven't exercised in 6 days. Tomorrow it will be a week. And it will be several more days before I exercise again. I feel so guilty about this and it causes a lot of anxiety as I wonder if I'll ever get back to my gym routine (I will).

Basically, I feel completely out of control right now. The only thing that is still going as planned is my diet and nutrition.

...And I have the stomach bug to thank for that.

Weigh in - another loss

Last week's weight - 275.6

This week's weight - 273.0

2.6 pounds LOST

56.4 pounds lost since June 2010

Thankfully, another loss. I want to say with two losses in a row my plateau of death is over, but I probably won't officially make that declaration until I'm in the 260s.

I've taken the last 3 days off from formal exercise and I may do am doing the same today. Early last week I was feeling sore, sore, sore. My knees twinged with pain, my ankle hurt if I moved it a certain way and my body just felt tired. I had been at the gym in some form or another at least 6 days a week for the last 6 weeks and I just needed a break.

This week will be another week for a low amount of exercise, as I'm heading to St. Louis Wednesday to go to the Cardinals home opener and hang out with family and friends. I plan to do yoga Monday and walk Tuesday and probably get another walk while I'm in St. Louis, but I will focus more on my nutrition and portions rather than exercise while I'm there.

I'm 2 days away from being fast food free for 90 days! I hope to continue this through my trip to St. Louis. No point in stopping now, I figure.

My goals this week are to keep my daily calories right around 1,900, drink at least 75 oz of water a day and blog more often. I know I've basically been MIA, but hopefully breaking through this plateau will give me a bit more inspiration to write.

Have a great week!

Weigh in - 3.2 pounds lost

Last week's weight - 278.8

This week's weight - 275.6

3.2 pounds LOST

53.8 pounds lost since June 2010

I feel like a weight was lifted off my shoulders with my loss this morning. Especially since I ate out a lot this weekend (mostly good choices and watched portions). I'm hoping this is a sign that the plateu of doom is over. I'd like to hit the 260s by April, though I might be stretching a bit there.

Off to enjoy get through Monday.

Disney bound + beginning running again

Disney bound!

If you follow me on twitter, you probably already know on January 7, 2012 I will complete the Disney World half marathon. It will begin at 5:30 am. I will maintain at least a 16 minute pace per mile (or be kicked off the course). And I will do it with dear friends.

With Warrior Dash in September, this will be my next big half-marathon. Of course I'll continue to do smaller races in the mean time.

The biggest challenge for the Disney race is the time limit. I walked the Mercedes half with a 16:25 pace. I don't see myself getting much faster than that unless I begin jogging. My back problems have prevented much progress.

I've signed up to complete Brad Gansberg's 5K in 100 days program. I hope with some instruction and 35+ lbs lost since I tried running last August, I can overcome this issue. I have a weak back. I know the problem stems from a weak core and I am trying to fix it, but it is no easy feat when you carry the majority of your weight in your midsection. After running a couple 1 minute intervals last week I've also realized I strike too hard on my heels causing my back and hips to absorb the shock. I'm not sure how to correct this.

So running is still scary to me. Remembering all of the injuries I had last summer/fall (2 ankle sprains and the back pain), I'm really insecure about running/jogging causing an injury. All I can do is try again, if I end up with another back injury then I know I am not ready and maybe I need to go see an orthopedic doctor to have it looked at. I've never had imaging on my back, so there could be a slight possibility I have a slipped disk or something else causing the pain.

If you have any advice on running form or preventing low back injury, please, please share!

A fake gain

The scale said 272.4 today.

WTF?!

I know, I know. I'm not supposed to weigh myself everyday. And I don't. But I do weigh myself a couple times a week and especially the day after a gain to see if it was a "real" gain or a "fake" gain.

I'm calling this week's fake. Hopefully, next week's weigh in will show that.

I'm changing my workout schedule a bit this week to accommodate some errands I have to run after work later this week. (The charge port on my 4-month old phone is busted. Lame.) Tonight I will hit the gym for a longer-than-normal work out to make up for days I'll miss this week because of errands and travel.

Monday - gentle yoga and walk 3 miles
Tuesday - Powerlift (same class as my Saturday strength class, but different instructor)
Wednesday - Off
Thursday - Walk 3 miles, upper body
Friday - Off
Saturday - Walk 7 miles (or whatever distance suits Stephen since it's his half marathon training)

I'm losing my water aerobics class I normally do once a week, but if we do 7 miles Saturday, I shouldn't be worried.

Weigh in: just call me yo-yo

Last week's weight - 277.4

This week's weight - 278.8

1.4 pounds GAINED

50.6 pounds lost since June 2010

So apparently we're in a yo-yo stage here. Gain, lose, gain, lose, gain. It's getting to be quite frustrating. Don't you wish the human body was like a car and came with warning lights and display panels to tell you when it needs a tune up?

Excuses? Oh yes, I have them. I ate too many calories yesterday (around 3,000). I had 3 margaritas and although I controlled my chip and salsa portion, I ate the entire portion of my order of fajitas (sans tortillas) that was drenched in oil. Want more? I'm sore from Powerlift (I increased my weight amounts yesterday) and I spent two hours raking leaves so my muscles are probably retaining water. Even more? It's that sneaky time of the month that makes you feel like a bloated version of your once shrinking self.

See, excuses? I have them. But none of them matter. I could talk for hours about all the perfect (or imperfect) I've done, but for whatever reason the scale isn't moving in the right direction lately and leaves me frustrated.

I have to own up that I'm not doing something right and correct it. I just need to figure out what that is. Because, I do have a goal to hit. Back in November I set a goal to lose 50 lbs by July 1. There are 16 weeks to go and hitting this goal is still within reach, I just need to stop the yo-yo.

No fast food for 90 days

In less than 20 days I will have been fast food free for 90 days.

It's not that I eat very much fast food any more. The days of eating it several times a week are long gone. But still, I do end up giving into cravings 1 or 2 times a month and have this stupid mental thing that road trips = fast food.

Case in point, on December 28th on my way back home from visiting family in St. Louis for the holidays, I stopped at Taco Bell. I can't remember exactly what I got that night but it was probably a bean burrito and a cheesy bean and rice burrito. That combination packs 860 calories, 31 grams of fat and 2410 mg of sodium. And normally I would have 3 burritos of different varieties as one meal from TB.

Since one of my items on my 101 in 1001 list is to be fast food free for 90 days and I decided 2 months ago this is the time. I will be fast food free until at least March 28.

Yes I've had cravings. I've wanted to drive thru for some french fries about a million times. Last night I just wanted to stop by Wendy's for a baked potato to go with my left over grilled chicken breast. After dinner last night, I wanted to binge on Arby's beef and cheddars.

But I didn't. I haven't done any of that for 71 days.

One of the reasons I wanted to do this is because I know even if I am making 'healthy' calorie choices at the drive thru window there is enough sodium in one a fast food meal to account for what a whole day's intake should be - or more.

Yes, I am on a quest to lose weight. But more than that, I want to be healthy. I want to eat whole, nutritious foods. Not processed crap with ingredients I cannot pronounce. Give me a choice between a large apple or pack of cheese crackers for a snack...

And I'll go with the apple please.

Turn that frown upside down

Today was a blah day. Nashville hasn't seen the sunshine in several days, a tight deadline at work had stress levels running high and my eating habits haven't been the best the last 3 days.

This all left me with a blah attitude and I REALLY didn't want to trudge to the gym in the rain.

But I did.

I started off my first mile at my normal 16:30ish pace. Then, I went to 2min/1min intervals of a 4 mph and 3.7 mph pace respectively. For my last mile, I ended up JOGGING five 1-minute intervals. And it felt good!

Around the half-way mark I thought maybe, just maybe I could get a 5K distance at or under 45 minutes. I didn't, but I still I felt so accomplished. I did 3.1 miles in 48:54 or a 15:40 pace, and that also included about a 3-5 minute warm up. So, Thursday I will try again, incorporating a little bit of jogging again.

Also, I have joined 5K in 100 days, too. So as soon as that starts up I'll devote a full blog post to it.

While running I realized I need some compression type pants to keep my stomach flab from flapping around. I think this will help care for my back too.

I also need to be sure to stretch my back out really well after each walk/run session.

Any tips for an overweight runner? Or someone with lower back issues?

Weigh in + random pictures

Last week's weight - 280.0

This week's weight - 277.4

2.6 pounds LOST

52 pounds lost since June 2010

2+ pounds is a very respectable loss, however, I am left wanting more. Which is just silly, but with my gain last week and the scale showing a 4 lb loss yesterday I was expecting to see that 4 lbs.

I'm considering whether the Powerlift class on Saturday's leaves my muscles retaining fluid on Sunday morning. I don't want to give excuses because I know my eating could have been better this week. There was free frozen yogurt, and overeating sushi and banana bread last night. Oh and almost a whole bar of 75% dark chocolate from a local chocolate company.

Next week I'll miss the Saturday Powerlift class because of the 5K I am doing, so I guess we'll see how next week's weigh in compares to this week's and determine if that is impeding my weigh ins.

I leave you with random pictures from the week.

Blooming flowers - the first sign of spring!

Mmmm chocolate

Friday night dinner - fajitas!

Don't mind the horrible face I am making (I was oxygen deprived), but I needed to
document the most sweaty I've ever been after a workout.

Post haircut

Week 1 check-in: Healthy March Challenge

March is in full swing and so is the Healthy March challenge!

I am so happy to have the supporters on Twitter doing this challenge with me. I am going to try to be better about Tweeting the challenge first thing in the morning as a reminder and check-in throughout the day.

With March 1st on a Tuesday, this was a short week of challenges. So how did I do?

• Tuesday I had my two servings of fruits as snacks (and then some) - I had 1 banana in the morning and some pineapple in the afternoon
• Wednesday I had 20 almonds (140 cals) - I actually keep a bag of unsalted almonds at my desk at work, so I admit this wasn't a hard one for me to complete
• Thursday was the nicest day of the week (with a high of 72) so it was wonderful to get out at lunch and take a walk. I ended up walking across campus to the medical center and back (about 25 minutes). I need to remember to do this more often!

So I completed 3 out of 5 days.

Today, I completely forgot about the challenge. I had brown rice for dinner, but lunch was fajitas, so I didn't have any rice or pasta with them. So I didn't complete today's challenge

Yesterday, I was running late before work and couldn't bother make eggs with veggies (my only idea I could think of for having veggies at breakfast). After polling the other Healthy March participants, I realized I could have easily popped a scrambled egg with broccoli in the microwave and sandwiched it between two slices of bread. Another participant had avocado spread on her whole wheat bagel. Genius!

Next week, I'm confident I can complete each day's challenge. I am especially excited for Tuesday's challenge: "use only stairs today." I work on the 10th floor, so it should be fun :)

If you're interested in the Wellcasts the calendar references, you can find them here.

Weigh in tomorrow - I'm pulling for a good one!

Vulnerability

Vulnerability.

I've been thinking a lot lately about when and why we let ourselves be vulnerable. For the last several weeks, for a variety of different reasons related to weight loss and not, I've been allowing myself to be very vulnerable to others.

Thinking about this made me relate it all back to my weight loss journey and think about how there is a lot to weight loss making me feel vulnerable.

Posting my weight on the Internet for friends, family, strangers, coworkers - EVERYONE to see. This means practically everyone in my life knows my weight. They know when I gain weight. They know when I lose weight. It leaves me vulnerable.

Sharing old pictures of me at my highest weight. Many of the people in my life now didn't know that Emily. With those pictures I was admitting I was once 355 lbs. It left me vulnerable.

I write down my random thoughts, admitting them to the world. I talk about my fears, my anxiety, my dysfunctional relationship with food. Things I've never admitted out loud, I write down for everyone to read. And that leaves me vulnerable.

The level of vulnerability I've been experiencing the last few weeks scares me to say the least, but I hope I am becoming a better person for it.

I know I suck at blogging this week. Healthy March update coming tomorrow. Weigh in Sunday and next week I hope to have some ideas in the back of my head for you.

By the way, I now have FORTY followers - FORTY! When I started this blog, I think the only person that read it was my roommate (heyyyyy KG). I thank you ALL for subscribing to read my crazy, sometimes uptight, thoughts about my weight loss journey. Y'all are the best!